#40: The Connection Between Languishing and Purpose

“How you see your purpose determines what’s possible for you.” This is a foundational truth I shared last week that I need to underscore right here at the start.

But there’s more to purpose than even this bold proclamation. Let’s do a quick overview of some of the bennies...most of which I haven’t previously shared because I like to tease you with bits and pieces so you keep coming back for more each week. Is it working?

Anyway...here are the hard facts:

When it comes to health and wellbeing outcomes, purpose...

Predicts longevity
Reduces incidents of heart attack or stroke
Supports faster recovery from certain kinds of surgery
Reduces the feeling of psychosomatic symptoms in daily life

There are cognitive benefits, too...

Slower rates of cognitive decline as we age
Lower risk of developing Alzheimer’s disease

And then there’s financial success. Purpose is associated with...

Greater self-reported income
Greater net worth
Lower levels of impulsivity
Playing the long game

Okay...these are good to know, but what about when you’re languishing?

We know that purpose is a strong predictor of health and wellbeing, cognition, and financial success. And these are all great and important. Now more than ever, though, purpose matters because it’s the perceptible sense that your life has direction.

More than 20 months into the pandemic, people are experiencing existential ennui. You likely heard about this months ago--a concept called languishing that Dr. Adam Grant popularized in an article. But languishing is a concept that has been around for much longer. And is especially relevant for the midlife crowd as it explains a lot of what’s behind the Happiness U-Curve research.

Life might technically be okay for you right now, but perhaps you’ve lost enthusiasm for your life. And making progress on any of your personal or professional ambitions seems ill-conceived and maybe even impossible.

In this collective crucible we’re all experiencing, what do we do? What do we do to not just survive but, dare I say it? I’m going to say it: what do we do to thrive?

We, humans, have a profound necessity to feel like there’s something out in front of us--as a way of being able to psychologically survive and persist.

And this isn’t a new need brought on by Zoom fatigue, compassion fatigue, caution fatigue, mask fatigue...and virtually every other type of fatigue you may experiencing right now.

Purpose is an ancient concept...we’ve been grappling with it forever.

And a lack of purpose is likely to bring out self-doubt. You see: your feelings of languishing aren’t as random as you might think.

I’m a coach and life transition strategist. We encounter transitions all the time...roughly 1 every 12 to 18 months.

When we transition out of something...when that thing comes to an end, we wonder, “Who am I?” This type of question of your identity--“Who am I?” “In what direction am I headed?”--is really important. To not necessarily know what’s next is unsettling, especially when we’re pressed for an answer.

In fact, here’s how a lack of purpose manifests across the lifespan:

Young through 20s: confusion and uncertainty
30s/40s/50s: ennui; unending drudgery and tedious routines
60 and Above: isolation and loneliness

So you can see that purpose is essential in that it provides a measure of stability amid uncertainty; it gives shape to our contribution in the world; and it buffers us against challenges we’ll confront.

And to really drive home the point, here are four things purpose gives us that material comforts can’t:

Purpose gives you a basis on which to decide, given your finite resources of time/money/energy, how best to allocate them moving forward.
Purpose is a mood regulator: it can help you remain even-keeled in moments of challenge, stress, difficulty.
- The more you know who you are and what you want, the less you let things upset you.
- Purpose-driven people have a smoother course...you don’t experience any less stress, but purpose mitigates the ill-intended consequences of stressors.
- Both in the context of stressors and uplifting experiences--emotionally even-keeled; a consistent emotional tone, no matter what’s happening...good or bad. You’re not hooked to whatever’s happening.
When you’re tuned into purpose, you’ll appear more attractive to others (interpersonal appeal); you’ve got a likeability factor and people want to be around you. When you’re pursuing something meaningful, there’s an attractiveness to you.
People who score highly on measures of “felt” purpose have broader and deeper social networks.

As you can see, purpose can be a deep and profound resource for you. So have I sufficiently appealed to your need for connecting more intentionally with purpose yet?

Are you ready to join me for Purpose Camp? If so, just go to meghankrause.com to get started.